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ChriS-tor-Y? book 2 – oh oh 7, chapter 5, = additional

book 2 – oh oh 7, chapter 5, = additional

title : killing the past, not very fast (the "who the f**k gives a sh*t RAP")

" i am killing the past..
but not very fast
i am not meant for this earth
no-one knows what I am worth

i kill off a million and 1 brain cell
to escape my personal hell
no-one notices, you dont see
because I am alone , i am just being ME!

as i try to kill my memory
at the beginning it tastes just fine
but soon turns bitter (because it reminds me if her)
& i drink bottles of Rose wine

I dont want to be like this
to be sarcastic, to take the p*ss
but that all I have right now
sh*t, i just hate that scared (sacred?)cow

no i dont, its just the booze
telling me what i did lose?
its like a nightmare, i cant wake up
so lets drink another cup!
and maybe the alchohol will win
so fill my mind full of sin

I remember fran, margit & young biggi
10, even 20 years or maybe even younger
born in the same sign, like JZ
I want to be a lover, but am i just a war-monger?

just to be used
or be called pathetic?
I would rather die
than become ap-a-thet-ic

so its good-bye
not au-revoir
it seems like i came from afar
but always end up in the f**king bar

to be a bridge
to solve someone else’s problem
so, must release my poison
i never really had them
dont worry, I wont last…much longer, you see?
but who gives a sh*t? , dont f**k with me!

….i am killing the past
but not very fast…."

ha ha ha !

(the above were written to that "unreachable love" ..I met someone who
was married, who told me she was leaving her husband but didnt &
then I had  no reason more to stay in the NetherLands, and at the time
I had to occupy myself with a final complaint (the 54th) v “germoney”
concerning my children Leon (10) and Noela (5) with little hope of
success……so I was/am very sensitive about trust and relationships,
trying not to let myself break down…but also did my best to support
her, and was ready to walk away becauyse SHE has 2 children, all the
prose I wrote came striaght from my heart…(soul) I am not religious
but I believe in the spirit of life…)


title: an obsolete father (or "goodbye, i’m RED, not dead")

let land-lords whither & die
for stealing what belonged to you & I
this world that once was green, blue  and true
is now almost wasted by the few

so let the money talk
whilst we imagine a walk
through fresh hills & valleys
and to swim in clear seas & streams
are they  now  my only dreams?

oh no, so much more in a better world
full of fun, footy, songs & laughter
selFISH fee-males make new rules
but we need more CARE and not more schools
give children a new chance
in another dimension ….not the "here-after"

before I move on, and leave this planet
imagine playing footy with my son
no more Adam, where is Le-on?
& more than 2 years since I held Noela
her new "pappa" is her mums new fella

my team is all thats left for me,
a part-time family – the global REDS
no family-tree, mostof them real people, you see?
i want to die, glorious, in battle,
not run-down by the "feds"…

…so kiss my arse..n*l  goodbye…

(exp : the injustices that rule the world, that pollute, and the lack
of care, sets a bad basis for y-our children, so who should take
responsibility, if you or I do not?)


title: dont waste my time

there is not a much bigger crime
than to waste my time
dont be a bore
i dont have much more

this life is all I have got
so dont let me rot
whilst I am waiting for you
and if you havent got a clue
what I am talking about
a smack in your ear
will solve your doubt!

(ex: is it such a hard thing to do?..to respect another person enough
not to keep them hanging around?…we only have so much time, its a
disgrace to waste it, but for another person to waste it for us is a
crime, and if its part of some political/business/or sexual
manipulation, then shame on you!…)

A man can’t be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
Oscar Wilde


to the BORG

Unknown song, by unknown man  (Chris transit cell , Freiburg 23 05 05)

In a cell what am I to be , nothing that u care about
I dont fit their plan because i FEEL, i am a man..Alone

sound of children (outside) cuts through my heart
why must my kids and I be apart?

who is sitting across the table, playing cards with me?
dont tell me about your children –
because mine are stolen and no matter what they say,
the love i have wont see light of day!

I search for the positive in these dark times
but where are my allies?
those who helped the enemy committ these crimes!

I need to give my love, deeper than the universe
IF i know tooo much , is that a strange curse?

who is the love I need to keep my soul fire burning?
where are you now? what do i do with this yearning?

and so my anger swells, treated bad , try not to be sad

the positive spirit comes alive,
as me and my lady strive
she who i feel in my dreams, only she can save me – with just one kiss

and  if i find her in time , i WILL be  Stronger again
to make her and I bind one force
greater than all,
but does she know?
= what we do in life echoes in eternity

to : Cowards@OLG Karlruhe & Landgericht Freiburg
(my to "legal ping-pong" of germoney’s childrens rights violation)

So, YOU play with my life,
were you damaged by your wife?
is SHE the "boss" in the house?
and you really are a MOUSE?

you are not a GOD!
you ARE just a silly SOD
who puts on a SILLY GOWN
and to me you seem like a CLOWN

with all your "rules" and such..
you dont amount to much!

I WILL PUSH for JUSTICE one day,
for VIOLATING US, you shall pay,
KARMA comes to you in many ways,
but, the pain, it always stays,

I shall continue to DEFY YOU!
because I am TRUE
not to any Nationa state,
against PREjudice, & hate..
…my destiny, …y-our fate!

(exp: written to the so-called "judges" that deny any form of justice
to my children to have access to me, or me to my children, and who will
cheat & lie or help others do that in order to avoid being proved

> …."in a cafe in gay Paris…
> sitting on my ar*e…
> wondering what to do,
> so I write this verse…

> coffee after coffee, and wine after wine
> so this is the life
> on the budget line…
> the music plays "I need your loving "
> and thats the way I feel…
> will she come to me
> I dont want to steal…"

> "In a corner sits a woman…
> talking to herself…
> the people turn to smile
> what do they know of her?
> all they care is for themself?…

> another glass of wine…
> and the world starts to look just fine…
> I am off to Porto 2morrow…
> hope to end this sorrow…
> the start of a new campaign…
> can Rafa advantage gain?

>"you are a devil in disguise…" (sings Elvis)
> oh those words are so WISE…."

(exp: the above are just random thoughts written in the middle of the
night at a "non-stop cafe" in the clichy part of Paris…..)

"sitting on the bank of the seine,
so what do I gain?
no pain..
go risk & dare,
others only stare,
you care! "

(exp: this written to anyoNE who dares risk to take a positive step,
and/or who cares about others…without looking for personal gain…to
do something because its a good thing to do, not for a "reward" )

ChriS> 3 years since Emlyn Hughes died…when I was a kid captain of
the Canvey team – he was my hero charging up & down – i even wore
no 6 and visualised his energy when I played..his
emmense energy enthusiams and sheer LOVE for the game was infectious…
before he moved into defence all over the pitch tackling and passing
and shooting (of course I never had a shot like that) …what would i
give for that energy that I missed when training with the
LUnatics…maybe its the 3 weeks sicky but I really felt sapped of
energy monday…hoep i feel better for next time (insha´allah) …
heres to EMLYN – probably the best Captain the REDS ever had – !
in memory..heres to you CRAZY HORSE!



the outstanding contrast between the lack of courage today, (considering "victory in europe" 60 years on) and then is the greatest difference in

during the last 10 years I was dismayed at the lack of courage and consequence amongst people, commercial pressure has over run y-our sense of
"good will" ….during the times when I opposed > fascism, corrupt officials, mayors, politicians, judges, police , lawyers (and liars) and
formed the only Union of its kind in europe for those "illegalised" by government "laws" which themselves contravene the UN and Council of
europe human rights conventions, or when I co-organised the "human shields" initiative , which arguably protected many children and
facilities in Baghdad prior to "allied invasion"…I have looked around, and often found myself "alone" even my Worldchild initiative has been
poorly supported, and thats just stupid, because we need our children to grow freely and blossom…

someone said "save me from my friends , I can deal with my enemies"

how true….its not my enemies that have deeply hurt me, but people I have befriended, privately and professionally, , in personal
relationships and bitten my hand of help, the more I help them the more they disrespect

I have lost my family, and "friends" and my last girlfriend continued a "trend" when she betrayed me without even token explanation, and
so-called "professional agreemtnts" are worthless , I may soon lose my home too, and yet I am the last one to use the "system" to protect
myself, if i cant resolve the problem myself, as that system which serves injustice defies my own life philosophy…

I wont repeat that, just remember that each one of you dont need to do good to get to heaven, both "heaven and hell" are here, and what you do may or may not come back and haunt you (karma)

dont "do good" for an ulterior motive, do good, for Goodness sake…and if you really need a "reason" then make it for y-our childrens sake"

remember this in all you do

as I lay my dreams before you
be careful where you do tread
that you may tread on my dreams

p.s. keep your sense of humour it s the only way to escape alive ; – )

copyright : Chris. R. SMITH ;   1, 10,  2007 @ 3efloor Prins MauritsStraat 20a  8019 XTR Zwolle, NL

„A very great vision is needed and the person who has it must follow it
as the Eagle seeks the deepest blue of the sky." Tashunkewitko – Crazy
In the Interest of Sharing: ..the best classroom in the world is at the
feet of an elderly person. … the best teachers are children.
…having a child fall asleep in your arms is the most peaceful feeling
in the world. ….never say no to a gift from a child. Those are the
most precious gifts on earth. ….no matter how serious life requires
you to be, everyone needs a friend to act crazy with. ….sometimes all
a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand. ….we
should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for. …it’s those
small daily happenings that make life so spectacular. ….under
everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
…the Creator didn’t do it all in one day. What makes me think I can?
….love – not time, heals all wounds. …you can make some one’s day
by simply sending them a little note. ……regardless of your
relationship with your parents, you’ll miss them. …making a "living"
is not the same thing as making a life. …life always gives you a
second chance. …every day you should reach out and touch someone.
Cheers! – From „Jim „
– "Vision without Action is merely a dream. Action without Vision is
passing the time. Vision with Action can change the world!"
– "Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" – M L King
– "Do not be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an
experiment. The more experiments you make the better. What if they are
a little coarse, and you may get your coat soiled or torn? What if you
do fail, and get fairly rolled in the dirt once or twice. Up again, you
shall never be so afraid of a tumble" – Ralph Waldo Emerson
– "Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far
one can go"-Eliot -"To be yourself, in a world that tries, night &
day, to make you just like everybody else -is to fight the greatest
battle there ever is to fight & never stop fighting"- Cummings
-"Do what you can, with what you have, with where you are" – Theodore Roosevelt
– "Don’t let school interfere with your education" – Mark Twain
– "The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence
whatsoever that it is not entirely absurd; indeed in view of the
silliness of the majority of mankind, a widespread belief is more
likely to be foolish than sensible" – Bertrand Russell
– "The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud"
– Coco Chanel -"Integrity has no need of rules" – Camus
AND……..(dont forget) – „Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new"- Einstein

"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen, nor touched…but are felt in the heart." -Helen Keller 
2 "Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile
and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same."
3 "To know someone here or there with whom you can feel there is
understanding in spite of distances or thoughts expressed ~ That can
make life a garden." -Goethe
4 "Don’t walk in front of me, I may not follow.
Don’t walk behind me, I may not lead.
Walk beside me and be my friend."
– Albert Camus  5 "Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused." Anonymous
6 "A friend is a gift you give yourself." -Robert Louis Stevenson 
7 "If you have it [love], you don’t need to have anything else, and if
you don’t have it, it doesn’t matter much what else you have." Sir
James M. Barrie
8 "Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart." -Confucious
9 "Your friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you." – Elbert Hubard
10 "You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely." -unknown

team4L1verpooL@hotmail.co.uk AlieNew5@chrismith.eu


The band I took to LP who turned our to be ungrateful brats (perfect
attitude for the “pop world”) released their CD that I organised ;

Press release (Dutch)


DSD, bestaande uit Sofie Letitre (piano/zang), Ype Koopman (bas), Ron Jansen (drums)
en Chris El-Hage (gitaar/zang), zijn net terug uit Liverpool.
De hoogtepunten van de reis waren twee hele succesvolle optredens in de wereldberoemde Cavern Club.
29 september en 1 oktober stonden zij op dezelfde podium als waar The Beatles 40 jaar geleden
doorbraken en hun carriere lanceerden.
De DSD fanclub heeft nu een internationaal gezicht verkregen doordat het publiek
uit Liverpool enthousiast DSD beschreef als "AWESOME"


De nieuwe cd van DSD (opgenomen bij de Treehouse Studios in Liverpool) ….
is nu beschikbaar en te bestellen via hun website http://www.damstardeep.com.
Hun cd bevat een brede scala aan eigen nummers met een zeer diverse stijl.
Van Jazz-Pop tot Funk-Rock. Nummers als Dilemma, Psycho Sofie en Shopping for Love.
Damstardeep biedt ook een "collectors T-Shirt" aan. Fans kunnen deze samen met de cd kopen.


Voor info over opkomende optredens kun je terecht op de website http://www.damstardeep.com of via
de e-mail van cemil@freedome.org

The people of Liverpool, thuisbasis van meer nummer 1 hits dan waar dan ook in Europa,
hebben DSD in hun harten gesloten. Daarom is de verwachting dat de nieuwe fans "thuis"
in Nederland dit ook snel zullen doen;

Original Message:
From: Angela Marchetti angelus_furens_in_tenebre@yahoo.de
Date: Mon, 14 May 2007 17:05:41 +0200 (CEST)
To: cs@chrismith.eu
Subject: Hei Hei!!

Heyya Chris:)

I`m so happy for U:)) I REALLY wish U a honest person who understands U
from heart!! I think after all u deserve it! Yo! Yeah well, I`m doing
fine here. The island/ continent/country here is quite amazing…We`ve
been on a 1000meter rock today, makin fire and picnic. I`ll send U some
pics soon:) Haven`t seen so many stars like here and so bright! Maybe
also `cause U cannot see any town `till horizon, and the horizon is
biiiig…Hey and the milky way looks really like a snake( with
head)…Incredible…And I haven`t met THAT friendly and open people
before, maybe `cause many o`them are irishblooded!? We`ve visited the
indigenous-film-festival at the Operahouse in Sydney. Seen a few
aboriginalmade movies; a mix o`drama/action/docu.(Great) . A couple o`
young  American natives showed their selfmade movies as well (cool),
and late at hour all the natives gave  question and answer on stage. Ah
by the way, I have an own australian mobile nr. now:
0061/449184821.Could you send me
 your mobile nr. again?

Big fat huggies  from Angie

P.S.: bought me a new guitar (Fender/blacklaquer), yeah it goes on and on…:))

——————————— Hello Brother Fuat ,

here is my perspective

from the agreement we signed ;

"The initial initiative to combine the experience & talents of “CS”
& “FK” in Cultural Exchange – Creative Enterprise & Concepts-
Education – Language & Communication; and ancillary services
relating to councelling and consultancy. With iStanbul as the centre of
operation to enable networking between Europe & Asian contacts."

General Strategy

I believe that we should get our services established & promoted
with low cost (internet) promotion and person to person contact – this
can be done at Universities, schools & community meeting point…I
dont agree to pay any costs! BEFORE starting our co-operation

WHY have you not sent me the internet banking info? – I am ready to
make committment but WE BOTH must stay in line with agreements or we
just lose time and get stress (which already caused you heart attack!)
– work clever not harder!

The LIVERbird project

– until we have a foundation for our activity – it is not advisable to
make a big project – UNLESS it can be done with other peoples money –
and no bank loans ! – this is something we have to work on WITHIN our
daily activity from January. – also note ; the WEST is suffering from
banking / credit "mini-crisis" – therefore it may be better to look for
investors in unusual places – such as India & Asia …western
people are a bit nervous – certainly NO-One is likely to look at
anything now – christmas is on their mind , and they usually wont even
consider (however great! ) any new offers until the new
year…so…when we have the website – we canb start promotion – but
that needs to be up & running…

cost Zero = 100 % Profit

 our first aims include "Education – Language "

ONE of our BIGGEST assets is that
a) everyone needs GOOD english (not just any english) to promote
themselves on the internet & worldwide or to negociate comfortably
in Istannbul or whilst travelling –
b) there are 20 million people IN ISTANBUL…we only need 1% reaction to be a success!
 my command of global business english (including my personal
experience of marketing) is UNIQUE – NO one in Istanbul is better at
preparing someone for a business aimed at any market where english is
used – I cost US NOTHING – so ANY clients bring 100 % profit withOUT
cost ? – what property project is better?,…so WHY DONT YOU TELL
EVERYONE (Andrew claims to have made 1 million Euros from language /
seminars last year – did you get that ?…so why dont we get started?
why dont you start telling everyone you meet in Istanbul  NOW – ? so
that when I come I have a FULL calendar of teaching ? (you can tell
them even just whilst you are doing your normal daily duties- you are
not shy in talking , my brother! <smile>)


PLease TAKE TIME to READ my communications carefully – english is not
your native tongue so sometimes you must try to get the message I want
to send you – When I mentioned Adem it is not to work with him – I do
not trust anyone who lets me down – I already solved the first Eured
t-shirts – BUT there is a lot of business to be done – AGAIN I must
explain that WE DO NOT PAY ANYOne in advance – ! otherwise I dont go
ahead with partnership – we have the market so they must supply &
get paid on sale! – or I find someone else
 Cahit PROMISED that he would show his designs by end of November
(tomorrow) he is a nice guy – BUT I will look for a NEW ISP / website
designer (there are many!) if he cant meet this date!

remember our agreement :
"“CS” & “FK” shall each receive the equivalent of euros 500 per
month (maximum) to cover theır personal expenses – any other costs must
be mutally agreed BEFORE expenditure." "



I have been distracted by personal issues – leaving Zwolle &
relations there – closing bank etc etc & the personal worry of my
Noela (birthday yesterday)  & son Leon…coming days are difficult
for concentration because the minds of people are in getting things
done because of the holidays – so they dont listen much – BUT – I am
doing some subtle marketing for US – do the same – because I want to be
ready – however I dont agree to any new apartment/office outside our
" address shall not exceed the cost of equivalent to euros 500 per month!"
 (cant you negociate to stay in Sultanahmet at a lower rent?)

thanks for sending Noela a card – many people did – and of course it is
possible they are thrown in rubbish bin – but I didnt ask because of
that – its so the mother gets the message that my problems are known by
many people – so my little girl is not forgotten & nor does her
Daddy forget her – !

lets now get on – follow our agreement and make this a good new year 08!

Another “HOPEFUL” venture to support Fuat and connect with CSEMA/EdAgN

JOINT  VENTURE  Agreement                           dated     


Chris. R.. Smith  (here after known as “CS”) of :
(previous address)
Unit8-15 16 Henry Street,
Great Britain

Fuat Kolca (here after known as “FK”) of :
EmirSinan Mah. Piyerloti Cad:
Şerefiye APT No:45 K:3 D:5

Aims :

A To fulfill the concepts & services stated at and within the JOINT-VENTURE (“JV”) websıte:


Territory: Global

The initial initiative to combine the experience & talents of “CS”
& “FK” in Cultural Exchange – Creative Enterprise & Concepts-
Education – Language & Communication; and ancillary services
relating to councelling and consultancy. With iStanbul as the centre of
operation to enable networking between Europe & Asian contacts.


This is a not-for-profit joint – venture enterprise, the dynamıcs
should provide considerable financial results – which after clearing
management costs & expenses will provıde charitable creative
investment in the local & global community.


The management shall be shared equally between “CS” & “FK”
no management decisions or financial decisions shall be made without mutual agreenment between “CS” & “FK”

the offıce locatıon shall be:
Selahadin Pinar Cad.
Mevlüt Çavuş sokak
Özdemir İşhanı No:4 K:3 D:8
Mecidiyeköy/İstanbul 34100

This shall also be the resıdential address of “CS” & “FK” to ensure that activities are managed “24/7” .
“CS” & “FK” shall each receive the equivalent of euros 500 per
month (maximum) to cover theır personal expenses – any other costs must
be mutally agreed BEFORE expenditure.

the above address shall not exceed the cost of equivalent to euros 500 per month!

JV Structure
As managers “CS” & “FK” shall also hold 52 per  cent of the stated capital aim of 100000 lire (T) JV – (26 per cent each) 

The remaining 48 per cent will be offered to friends or relatives of
“CS” & “FK” – without those shareholders having any management
voting power – these non-voting JV shareholders may own up to 10 per
cent each and will be chosen ONLY by mutual consent of “CS” & “FK”.

The managers shall inject 50% of the share value (for example 26% of
100000 YTL = 26000 share value – requıres an injection of 13000 YTL
value – & up to 10% of this could be fıxtures & fittings fort
he Office or communication / computer equıpment.

The JV expects its BANKERS to match thıs amount providing sufficient working capital.


As it expected that the special relationshıp of “CS” & “FK” with
LIVERPOOL football supporters Worldwide (almost One Million Lıverpool
fans buying souvenirs & clothes Worldwide) shall bring considerable
revenue – the EuRED part of thıs JV shall develop a specıal supporters
club card  and start a “LIVERPOOL hotel/hostel) network to have at
least one new base every year.

Agreements & dispute

İnternational common (natural) law shall decide all agreements and any
resulting dispute that cannot be resolved by “CS” & “FK” shall be
within a reasonable time shall then result in the closure of the “JV”
operations services and any ancillary activities. Assets shall be
returned pro-rata to the shareholding investors & the mutually
agreed expenses of  “CS” & “FK” be paid. Any contuning dispute will
be settled by a neutral international court, ın accordance with the UN
Universal declaration of human rights (1948).



some Favourite places to be

…Anfield LIVERPOOL ; Attaturk Istanbul and Toblino (Trentino)

to be continued …in the CULTural "08"…


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